“Tim Sproul is the only person who can recite a poem in a bar and not get killed.” —novelist Willy Vlautin
I walked in nervous
to the iconic fisherman’s watering hole.
It was Sunday afternoon
and everyone was hungover.
It was getting testy at the horseshoe pit.
I had made the ill-advised choice
to launch my book of poems here.
The sun was out.
Bud Lights were flowing like arguments.
I befriended a young deckhand
built like Brad Pitt from Fight Club.
We raised a glass and lifted our spirits.
He sensed my energy,
then he did something remarkable.
He stood on top of a picnic table
and bellowed,
"Shut the fuck up,
I wanna hear some fuckin' poetry."
I recited exactly three poems that day
and sold five books.
I traded a copy for a pair of rubber boots.
And another for shots of Fireball.
An old boat captain asked
if I'd write a poem for his girlfriend.
Another asked me to sign a book to his daughter.
I thought I'd never leave the bar.
When I finally got up to go,
I didn't walk out. I floated.
I have three published books of poetry.
They’re all sold out. But if you’re really nice, I can get you a copy. I’ve taken my poems to clubs, bars, living rooms and client off-sites, best served with tequila.